Safe to Journal?

Your journal can become comforting, like a good friend.

Candess M. Campbell  –  12 Weeks to Self-Healing: Transforming Pain through Energy Medicine

Many of us love to journal. The notebook that keeps our sacred thoughts becomes an extension of us. It becomes full of memories similar to the photos that we have stored for years. 

Many of my clients had shared that they were resistant to journaling. Although I suspected it was because they were afraid of the inner journey, it was not that at all.  It was because in the past, someone had found and read the journal. 

Whether this betrayal was from a parent, sibling, friend or spouse, it was devastating. One client shared that her brother found her journal and read it and teased her. Another said that when she was a child her mom found her journal and was angry at what she had written. She then was punished for her writings.

Having journaled most of my life and having 30 years of my life chronicled in my journals, I can’t imagine what my life would have been like without that written inner journey. 

binder

What I suggest is to purchase a canvas 3 ring binder and use a small lock. You can then use a spiral notebook or 3 holed paper and store your writings in this locked binder. You can also buy a locked journal, but most often they are small and you don’t have the room to write messy and large which happens often in a journal process. 

Another option would be to buy a locked box. Either of these choices can be stored in a closet or under your bed when you are done.

sentrysafe

You can also journal on your computer and store your entries in an anonymous file or add a password to your file. I journal both ways and I find both to be profoundly helpful!

We are in the back-to-school season, so this is a great time to store up on journals, binders, and fast writing pens.

Yesterday I shared with you about Sentence Stems. Here are a few other ways you can begin to use your journal.

These are taken from 12 Weeks to Self-Healing: Transforming Pain through Energy Medicine. 

  1. Dear God/Goddess letter – Write a letter to God or Goddess stating everything you need to say. Write as if you are having a private meeting with Him or Her—because you are!

  2. Gratitude list – This is one of my favorites. Write down ten things that fill you with gratitude, and eventually work up to a list of twenty. If I find myself in a grumpy mood, I do this daily. It’s difficult to be angry or negative after doing so, because this activity seems to lift the heart. Completing this exercise weekly is a great goal to improve your mood.

  3. Anger letter – In having journaled for over thirty years, I believe that venting can be quite helpful. When I started going through my journals to pull out the information I wanted to save, I definitely had to sort through the angry letters. Letting this energy go on a piece of paper is much better than turning it inward toward yourself and creating depression or pain—or turning it outward toward a loved one or innocent friend and creating trouble in your relationships. 

In future blogs I will share other ways to use your journal. Please feel free to share your own experiences and ideas!

 

Iwannabeaskinnybitch!


Blog, Journal, Blog, Journal . . .

“What we all want, really, is to be loved. That craving drives our worst behavior.” 

― Jodi PicoultHandle with Care

106_0131

Creating a blog can motivate the success of any goal.  Sharing my experience losing weight, eating healthy and exercising has been monumental in my success. The feedback I am receiving, private and public, tells me the the blog is helping you too! 

In addition to blogging there is also journaling, but they are very different experiences. With blogging, although I am writing to motivate myself, I have an audience. Being public gives me pause not to share some private thoughts and behaviors. In my journal, I have the freedom to say it all.

When journaling, I write anything and often what comes out comes from a place other than my conscious mind. You will see this in my August 8th journal post “Journaled my Breakthrough.” 

When you journal another part of yourself shows up and can be empowering. Maybe it is a nurturing voice that encourages you so that you stay on track. It could be a harsh voice that keeps you in line, and you listen.

Journaling prior to eating something or to motivate you to get moving can be powerful! For instance, let’s say you want to have a cup of ice cream (my fav!) Well, if you are like me, it is unlikely a cup of ice cream would be it. Once I start with ice cream, it seduces me to the bottom of the carton. Full disclosure – I would never buy a size larger than a pint and usually I buy the single serving sizes, times two. 

So instead of eating ice cream – or in my case going to the store to by ice cream (never have it around) you might want to journal.

I have developed a journal process for you to use in my  12 Weeks Toolbox

Find a journal and fast writing pen and set the timer for 10 minutes. Keep writing and don’t stop even if you have to write, I don’t know what to say, I don’t know what to say over and over until you break through. Eventually, you can work up to 20 minutes.

Use these sentence stems to get your journal process started. Each one can be a 10 – 20 minute timed writing. 

What I love about myself is . . .

I am really hungry for . . .

What frustrates me is . . .

If I had more time . . .

Hunger and cravings can be caused by emotions that are buried. Stress is also a factor in overeating, eating when you’re not hungry and eating unhealthy foods . Often after journaling, the craving to eat or drink just dissipates.

Play around with journaling when your cravings are gnawing at you for a week and see what happens.

 

Candess M. Campbell, PhD is the author of 12 Weeks to Self-Healing: Transforming Pain through Energy Medicine. Her upcoming book on Sentence Stems will be published soon!  

Iwannabeaskinnybitch!


Accountability

“I decided to take an aerobics class. I bent… twisted… gyrated… jumped up and down… and perspired for a half an hour. But by the time I got my tights on…. the class was over!”      – Anonymous

 

Several years ago I wanted to begin exercising again by riding my recumbent bike for 30 minutes a day. For motivation I called my friend Cheyenne and told her my goal. For every day that week that I didn’t ride my bike, I would pay her $50. She was delighted to help. Did I ride every day that week? Of course!

money  Once I understood how motivated I was by that agreement, I used it with clients.  When they were stuck and not obtaining their goals, I made this offer. They would clearly outline their goals and I would assist them by having them write a $50 check to the charity of their choice. I’d keep the check and if they didn’t reach their goal, I’d put it in the mail to their charity. I’d even provide the stamp.  Just thinking of writing a check (money talks) motivated them to complete the goal. Accountability works.

 What motivated me to write this blog, and a case in point, is that I am transcribing this blog on my iPhone while I’m walking Domingo along the Spokane river.  After spending this morning on Skype with Mahfuzul making changes on my website and creating coupon codes to give away a free CD download to my list, I really wanted to stay in my office and get the email out!

Domingo at the Spokane River

Domingo at the Spokane River

Because I have a training session with Luke, my athletic trainer tomorrow morning, I was motivated to “step away from the computer” and take a 45 minute walk in between clients. (Oh, I just found a quarter in the dirt!)

My work is fun and I love it, but I’ll have plenty of time to get back to work later. Right now I’m building my commitment to movement and exercise until my body craves it as much as my mind loves to work.

It helps to be accountable!

Iwannabeaskinnybitch!

 

If you want to receive the coupon for the free download of my 12 Minute Energy Clearing CD, you can sign up on my website at http://candesscampbell.com.

I’ll set the email to go out on Friday August 22nd.

 

 


Reiki Healing

“The power of belief, the absolutely awesome incredible power of belief, is the genie in your life. Let me say that again.

The absolutely awesome incredible power of belief, is the genie in your life.”  — Eldon Taylor

12 Weeks to Self-Healing: Transforming Pain through Energy Medicine  shares about self-healing and healing others.

This is an excerpt from my #1 Best-selling book. (p. 149)

When teaching Reiki healing for many years, I have told my students that we all have the ability to heal. Many clients experienced their own ability to feel energy and heal themselves as well as others in this process.

 2An illustration of this principle involved a client of mine with cancer who was in the hospital preparing for surgery. I asked my students to meet me there and use Reiki to help calm her and assist in the healing process. When the doctors located a blood clot and could not operate, I invited my students, as well as the client’s mother and sister, to assist me in laying hands on the client. After talking with the nurse in charge, I understood the clot needed to dissolve before they could operate. We all imaged this as we did the healing. A period of a half hour or so went by, and when I felt an immediate sense that the healing was complete, I asked the nurse to check again. They did, and the clot was gone. The client was subsequently able to receive the needed surgery, the mother and sister of the patient were able to be helpful, and my students’ confidence in their healing ability increased. It was a glorious day!

We are all connected to the Source, and we all have the ability to channel this love. Here are some exercises to practice so that you can define your beliefs and connect with the God of your heart, as well as get in touch with your own healing abilities.

http://www.candesscampbell.com


Steps to Resolving Conflict

“Sure it hurts, but if you love someone, you forgive them.” Blanche
“Somethings you forgive, somethings you never forgive.” Kate” 

Neil SimonBrighton Beach Memoirs

Recently at Interplayers Theatre, I saw the play Brighton Beach Memoirs by Neil Simon. It was an incredible performance that exemplified the topic at hand – conflict.

The story is about Eugene, an adolescent, Jewish boy in 1937. He recalls his memories of living with his parents, aunt, two female cousins, and his brother at a time when he was going through puberty, sexual fantasy, poverty, and living in a crowed home. In this play, Eugene Jerome, played by Nich Witham, gave an over-exaggerated sense (in a fantastic performance) of not being heard and doing what he could to find his place and get his needs met in this family.

Brighton Beach Memoirs

This play was a great backdrop for me to expound on how to resolve conflict and the pitfalls of communication. Here are some helpful steps.

Clear with this person on an energetic level.

1. Ground your energy. Here is a video that will teach you to do this. http://bit.ly/wBHJbh

2. You have an aura around you which is part of your energetic self.  Imagine pulling your aura in around your body. Pull it in about 6 – 8 inches around you.

3. Focus in your heart and bring your attention out of the top of your head into the heavens.

4. Image the person there with you. At this level, send them love from your heart. You may also imagine sending them golden white Light from your heart.

5. If you can do this without anger or negative feelings, talk with them at this level

6. Come back down, image yourself filling up with golden white Light and release any leftover energy down your grounding cord.

Steps to resolve conflict in person.

1. Write out the situation in your journal and then re-read it the next day. Sometimes it helps to do this a few times, so that you can become clear on what happened and what you want to communicate.

2. Become aware of your own part of the situation, even if you perceive it to be minor in comparison to the other person.

3. If you are angry, look at where you may be feeling hurt or fearful. These emotions are often right under the surface of anger. Feel your feelings and let them go. Journal them over and over if need be.

4. Contact the person you are having conflict with and use clear, direct, honest communication. I suggest you meet in person (not via text or email) because this allows you not only to read the body language, but also to open your heart.

5. Give the other person the chance to communicate their side completely. It is helpful to use the words, “I heard you say,” and repeat back to them what you heard and let them clarify. This helps them to feel heard. You can hear what someone is saying without agreeing with them. It is important that you hear.

6. Once the other person feels heard, share your side. They may not listen well and you may not feel heard. If that is the case use the broken record method. Continue to say the core message again and again, “I hear what you say, and ______.” Yes, that is true, and _______.” Do this until they are able to understand they are not hearing you.

7. Make a request of the person such as “My request is we put this behind us and go on from here,” or “My request is that we continue to meet and talk weekly until we can resolve this.” You can use whatever it is that you desire.

8. Trust your intuition, and use as many of these steps as you would like. If the person is not willing to meet with you or clear the situation with you, then move on and let it go. No longer allow them into your energy field and set healthy boundaries.  (I will share more about this in a future video and blog.)

Sometimes people have a hard time clearing conflict because of negative communication patterns.  Often these reactions were learned in early childhood as a survival response to a dysfunctional family. In this case they may triangle in other people to take sides, or become passive aggressive and rather than talking with you directly, they will be passive in their aggression in a subversive manner.

One of the books I recommend for healthy communication is Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life by Marshall B. Rosenberg

You can find other valuable information at http://candesscampbell.com/books/self-help-toolbox


Listen to What you Say!

“The word ‘listen’ contains the same letters as the word ‘silent’.” 
― Alfred Brendel

Although I love social media, when using it, we often make connections that are more about quantity than quality. Hopefully, the relationships you create can meet your emotional needs as well as your other needs.

When you are actually in the presence of someone you can deepen the communication. Deepening relationships is important to emotional health. What happens is, when you get to let people get to know you, you begin to know yourself. When you hear yourself share, you hear yourself share!

IMG_0862 When I taught my Intuitive Mastery Class yesterday, I heard myself say, “I don’t let many people work in my energy field. Not all healers are the same.” We were talking about Reiki and other forms of energy healing. As I thought about it later, I realized that I sounded judgmental and I decided to look at whether I was being judgmental, protective of my students, or both. What I could have said was, “when you study to become an energy healer or a Reiki practitioner, it is important you do the emotional work and learn to keep your energy field clean. Also, when receiving energy work, discern whether or not the energy healer is the best fit for you.” These statements would have been more positive.  Listening to myself when teaching assisted me in taking inventory of my attitude and speaking in a clear, loving manner.

Another incidence was in conversation with a dear friend of mine. She asked me if I realized I said, “do you know what I mean?” over and over. I began listening for this and had a difficult time hearing it. When we Skyped for an hour one day, she pointed it out to me. I said it so many times it was nauseating! I began to listen to myself and hopefully have learned not to keep asking, “Do you know what I mean!”

Listen to yourself and share with me what you hear on Facebook under this blog post, Day 11 in the Relationship Series!


Being the Pole

“When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are.” 
― Donald MillerA Million Miles in a Thousand Years: What I Learned While Editing My Life 

Relationships are fluid and changing all the time. Communication is often a challenge and keeping up with the shifting can be disconcerting. In this video I teach you to “Be the Pole.”  It is a great way to stay stable when you have a partner that is either reactive or changing their minds continually.  Enjoy!