There has been so much that has happened in the last few weeks and my apologies for not staying on track here.
Finally, after two years of ultra-sounds and watching the lump near my thyroid grow, I decided to have my thyroid removed. The self-healing tools I used were helpful in some areas, but did not heal the thyroid.
Carolyn Myss, a medical intuitive, says that “your biography is your biology” and I believe this to be true. I have been journaling and reflecting and looking at what emotional and energetic patterns are related to the problem in my fifth chakra (The Power of Communication.) I am clear on some and not on others and will be sharing this in the future.
Prior to the removal of my thyroid and the plum size lump, as well as the new lump that the doctor said looked “suspicious,” I communicated with my thyroid and could clearly see that the lump was encompassing it. What the doctor said was that is was what they call an “angry” thyroid. It made sense to me that I would be tired all the time because my body was doing everything it could to heal the thyroid.
For now though, I am grateful that my energy is much better. I wake up feeling energized and at night I am “sleepy” not the usual “tired” all the time.
I am on track again and my focus is to increase my energy by even more movement in the next month. I will return to weight training next week, and Domingo is waiting for the long walk I promised him.
Mom, let’s go!
Here is a Journal Exercise I often use. I think you’ll like it.
Your journal is a great place to inventory yourself. If you need to be uplifted, write things about yourself that make you feel good. If you are stuck, you might find it useful to write about what you would like to change. I love what Caroline Myss recommended at a workshop I attended. She suggested, “Write out everything you are doing you know you should not be doing and everything you are not doing you know that you should be doing.”10
Wouldn’t you know! It was when I was facilitating a journal class on the fifth chakra (throat – communication) that it all came to me. In one of the writing exercises I realized how great it was to have the support I am receiving in my business. I have a Mahfuzul who does my websites, Filip who edits the sound on my mp4s, Robert who fixed my Outlook issues, and Julie who is absolutely the best bookkeeper ever! Great awareness.
The next sentence stem was picked by one of the students. We wrote “What I need to change is. . .” Well, was I ever surprised!
My writing went like this. What I need to change is what I need to change. What the __ does that mean? A little anger here. Some pain is coming up. My face – there is pressure near my eyes and cheeks. I am feeling defensive and protective of myself. This really hit a nerve. What? I am breathing deeply. My solar plexus is tight. My throat is closing up. Okay this is the 5th chakra so let’s talk about my thyroid. I have a lump on my thyroid the size of a plum. Okay. I am getting clearer. I feel like crying. I feel hopeless around my weight . . .
Private journaling information –
. . . I have been talking today about how good it feels to have help, support, work as a team. I am sad about (relationship ending – touch, oxytocin, etc.) My dad and I cuddled and I gained weight because he and I ate all the sugary foods. I do want to create a relationship where I can be supported by someone when I work out and get healthier. I don’t want to wait for a relationship. For this part I will get a trainer. Oh, that feels better. Whew! Again, I don’t have to do it alone!
What I realized is that even though I am very self-motivated, in this area of my life, I am NOT! I do need help.
When it was my turn, I shared my writing and my “ah-ha” with the group. One of the women shared that she meets with her trainer 5 x a week. She said she lost weight but needed to build muscle and it was doctor recommended!
So I am making an appointment with an athletic trainer!