Staying on Track

“You never know what’s around the corner. It could be everything. Or it could be nothing. You keep putting one foot in front of the other, and then one day you look back and you’ve climbed a mountain.”    

 ― Tom Hiddleston

It is easy to start something and not so easy to keep at it. Often something happens that breaks your stride and you fall off. You move from feeling successful to feeling like a failure and then give up.

What if when something happens, whatever it is, it becomes a ‘wake up’ to transition?

That is what is happening to me. In this instance, I have blogged daily about my progress to health and weight loss since July 30th.

The first several days were in a word document and then posted on August 8th.

It has been over a month now and I hit my bump in the road.

Candess healing a quail that hit her windshield.

Candess healing a quail that hit her windshield.

I was doing well when I had the oral surgery and was on hydrocodone. I weaned myself as soon as I could because as a chemical dependency counselor (and a woman of many hats!) I knew the risk for dependency. It has been the last couple days that I realized how much pain I was really having.

This shifted my high motivation to blog and exercise, but it also solidified that any change in my life (and yours) is not an ‘either/or’ process, but just that, a process.

The two ways I have motivated my experience have been 1) hiring a trainer (Luke) and 2) blogging my experience.

Truly, with this downward shift in my energy level and upward shift in my pain level, I am so grateful I had these who checks in place!

I have given myself a couple days to rest and took this week off from the gym. Nevertheless, I am still on track, feeling stronger (in body) and I am losing weight!

My blogging has given me the impetus toward my goals and kept me on my path.  Already on course, my transition now is to blog once or more a week and focus on sharing the gems. I will increase the time I spend moving, whether it be walking, dancing, gardening, or having fun with Luke at the gym!

Thanks for reading and keeping me accountable!

Iwannabeaskinnybitch!


Showing up with Humor!

“Drugs are a waste of time. They destroy your memory and your self-respect and everything that goes along with your self esteem.” 

― Kurt Cobain

 

Feeling happy that this blog is about health and not just weight loss and exercise or I would be in big trouble. Although the scale is going down, I have been remiss in much exercise this week.

On Friday, at the gym, Luke introduced me to a couple new exercises, which was great. Then my daughter picked me up and dropped me off at the Dentist downtown. I had a procedure that has left me loopy for a few days with the Hydrocodone.

hsn

I briefly remember being on the phone Saturday evening with HSN. I don’t generally watch HSN and now I am waiting daily to see if Rick, my letter carrier is going to ring the doorbell with a package. Hmm. . . wonder what I might have ordered?

Thankfully I am off the Hydrocodone and I don’t like it at all. I’m treating my pain with Tylenol, but not talking much.

Even with the pain, with the exception of one day, Domingo has walked me daily and most often twice a day. I’m looking forward to feeling better and being back to the gym!

Iwannabeaskinnybitch!


Catawampus

Catawampus arose in the United States around 1840, during a particular vogue in elaborate coinages.  Cata- stems from cater-, a now-archaic root meaning “diagonal,” while the source of -wampus  is subject to debate. – dictionary.reference.com

 When I awoke this morning I had a headache, pressure in the back of my neck and I couldn’t think. I knew my back was out which affected my neck. I rolled out of bed and headed directly to my inversion board hoping that hanging would help. Nope. I waddled downstairs and hung off the seat of my barcalounger, which always works, but nope. I was determined to go to the gym anyway because today was training day. First though, I made an appointment with my chiropractor for later.

Inversion Table

Inversion Table

Luke Brady

Luke Brady

 

 Luke Brady, my athletic trainer said we would start today with leg presses and he showed me what to do. I let him know I was catawampus, but was happy to be there. The first set (even without the weights) and my back popped in! Yippee! I shared with him and we were both happy that the results of weight training were showing up in many ways. 

 

 Having already made the appointment with Dr. Patrick Dougherty (chiropractor and friend,) I took off to share the great news with him. By the time I got to his office, I felt so much better. Dr. Pat and I have taught some Kinesiology classes together and I love his incredible skill level. (Everyone loves Dr. Pat!) 

 He put me on the table, did some testing and he gently shared, “I need to put your head on straight.” Any other man!!!  I was so grateful.

Dr. Pat

Dr. Pat

He did an adjustment and my body said yes!

 I also had him test me for whether or not grains supported my body. In an earlier blog, I said I went off grains, but after a week, I didn’t feel any different, digestion was the same, there was not a difference in weight even though I replaced grains with vegetables and it just didn’t make sense for me to continue to stop.

 He tested and said that my body did not test positive for grains, but that it was not a strong no, (my paraphrasing) and that if I did eat grains it could cause some inflammation and may make it harder to lose weight.

 No longer feeling catawampus, I am just so grateful to have the support I have on my journey!

 Iwannabeaskinnybitch!

 


Training Day!

Day Ten (This was Friday)

Okay, I confess. When my bookkeeper comes on Friday morning, the day I don’t see clients, while having my morning coffee I like to catch up on recorded TV shows. This morning before going to work out with my trainer Luke, I caught up on Million Dollar Listing: Miami. When I was watching Chris Leavitt’s open house I got an idea. The wife of the owner of the building was a nutritionist so he served the best juice he could find instead of the usual cocktails. He had yoga instructors teaching and demonstrating yoga on the terrace. The focus was on how to relax when you are stressed. He even had a woman who calculated the antioxidants in their systems.

Well Chris is the quintessential health nut. He spends a lot of time and money to take care of himself from what he eats to what he wears. He has luxurious spa days and . . .

What I realized is I would be a lot more careful about what I put in my body and have a much better attitude about my body if I spent less time in my head and working and thinking and more time having spa days. I can see it now. I have just had a massage and I am laying in a warm towel with a good book and the attendant brings me a pure, fresh water with lemon. I could get used to this.

spa

 Okay, but now I am off to the gym. Hope there are not planks today, but if there are, I am closing my eyes and going to the spa!

Friday Afternoon

 Second day of training proves to be great! I am learning so much. Not only am I becoming aware of my body, but also how it is I don’t support my health. For those who already know me, I am a compulsive creative! I spend too much time in my head!

 Luke, bless his heart adjusted the incline of the bench when I did my weights this time. It made it easier for me to sit straight up after my set. This is until I build up my back strength. But while lifting the weights, rather than focusing on my chest, I am creating a workshop in my head for my Meetup.com group, Spirituality & Self-Healing. This is where Luke would demonstrate some weight training exercises and offer a package deal where he will go to the home of his customer and train them! I caught myself and was able to get back into directing my mind to muscle.

free-weight-training-with-dumbbells

Now for the plank! Even though he also adjusted this exercise for me and I was able to be on my knees, I still closed my eyes and went into a day spa in my mind. This was a great workout. My body continues to feel stronger and he does not push me. He is communicative and responsive which is great. On my own, I would push myself, get exhausted, discouraged and quit. It feels good to be present to my body.


On track with my Training!

Day Eight – (This was last Wednesday)

Today was the first day of training! Domingo walked me first thing this morning!

The Club has a lot of stairs up to the gym and I was surprised I had to stop half way up and take a breath. After putting my items in my day locker I was ready to venture up another set of steps to meet Luke. Surprisingly I ran these stairs without effort. What is that about? Met with Luke at the gym. He started me on the weight bench face up with hand weights. Soon I realized that even sitting up from a laying position was more than my back to do and so we agreed he would take the weights and I could turn on my side to get up. Ugh!

My intention is to be gentle with myself and just witness and I have done well so far. My mind did wander back though to when I considered myself macho and had definition in my shoulder muscles. Oh, mid 1990s. That was 20 years ago. Watching my slow unsteady movement with the free weights was a real wake up call to how truly out of shape I am!

Athletics_top

Next was the Nautilus for my back, where I learned to squeeze as he pressed the middle of my back. Was I ever mistaken! I really thought I knew what I needed and could do it on my own. His training is so attentive and so different than what I expected. I see this could change my life!

raquet

 Wow! My eyes lit up when we went to the racquetball court for lunges. Have to digress here. When I used to work at a Federal Prison camp (as a counselor,) I worked out regularly with my dear friend and coworker Herm. We had a great time spotting each other and we both got a great workout; thus the definition in my shoulders. Well, one day we invited another coworker; I’ll call Carlos to play racquetball. Mind you, I am not a good racquetball player, but it was fun and a lot of exercise. Well, Carlos could not just have fun. First he tried to teach me. I didn’t want to be taught, I wanted to play for fun. Next, he came onto me sexually. Yuk! We were there to play racquetball. Next, he started putting me down. Really? I quickly realized that the three ways he knew how to be with women were to 1 – tell them what to do or how to do it 2 – treat them as sexual objects or 3 – be verbally abusive. Well, that was the last time he was invited to play.

Nevertheless, my eyes did light up at the Club because I loved racquetball. Loved the fun I had with my friend and also the high that comes from fun exercise and belly laughs!

Back to lunges. It was interesting how I realized how poor my balance was. I moved to the side of the wall in case I needed to touch it for support. My lunges seemed to be fairly good for the first time and I enjoyed it. Next planks.

plank

Laying on the mat I did my first plank. The tension in my lower back was of concern, but my shoulders did well. Luke was a gentleman and although I only made 10 seconds at a time, he was kind. The second set was a killer. My mantra was “torture.” The third set surprisingly was much easier and I sat back in the child’s pose and thanked my body for all she did today!

Okay, I am on track!

Iwannabeaskinnybitch!


Walking Slow

Day Five

Okay, I planned to go to the gym today and didn’t do it. In the afternoon, I did drive by the Club though on my way to Costco to find a backup drive for my computer. I like working out on Sundays. Saw my former boyfriend’s Rav4 parked there and thought, oh, I need to workout in the mornings. Not really interested in sharing the floor with him right now.

Domingo taking me for a walk!

Domingo taking me for a walk!

Domingo walked me twice. Once in the morning and once in the afternoon. That’s 30-minutes total, but it was hot and we walked slowly. Not too many points for me today.

Iwannabeaskinnybitch!


Acupuncture

Day Four

Thought I would go to the gym today, but didn’t. I am doing a Chinese herb cleanse and just realized that is why I don’t feel very well. OMG! I am de-toxing. I bought a set of six acupuncture sessions through Groupon with Dr. Song and I love acupuncture! I used to have it on a regular basis when my BFF Cheyenne lived in Spokane. Along with the acupuncture, I am taking the herbs. I am committed to increasing my health! I will adjust the amount of tea I drink each day so I can function better. Ugh!

IMG_1314

Resting, enjoying Domingo and watching movies. It’s 100 degrees outside!

Iwannabeaskinnybitch!


Met my Trainer!

Day Three

Met with Luke, my athletic trainer today to set up weight training. I really like him. He was relaxed and personable and not intimidating at all. He had a gentle manner and I felt comfortable. When I was younger I had a woman trainer that was tough, tough, tough! These days I am hard enough on myself. I need to desire training, not have it forced on me. Luke and I had similar beliefs about healthy food and he understood my fear about pushing myself too hard after having adrenal fatigue.

Haven’t shared my story? Well it is in my book 12 Weeks to Self-Healing: Transforming Pain through Energy Medicine. Here is the gist. In the late 2000s I became really ill with adrenal fatigue. I was working non-stop on my doctorate and running a full time private counseling practice, while doing other spiritual teaching projects. My energy started to plummet and I was gaining weight. I joined Curves and increased my workouts to four or more days a week. The more I exercised, I understood later, the more I wiped out my adrenals and my health took a dive. It took me about a year to get myself back to functioning, but barely. The best treatments for illnesses are outlined in my book. For adrenal fatigue, rest is the best!

Love my bike!

So, returning back to exercise has been scary for me. Now, back to Luke. We scheduled the first session for an hour and then 30-minute sessions after that. He set up for me to see him twice a week and three or more days a week I’ll do cardio of my choice. He even said I don’t have to go the gym. I love being home and I have a nice bike, a recumbent bike, and weights. I also walk along the river all the time. This is great!

Decided to go grain free rather than gluten free to see how my body responds.

 Iwannabeaskinnybitch!


Finding an Athletic Trainer

Day Two

Searched Trainers today on the website of the gym I belong to. Saw one that looked like he would fit. His bio read Spine/back strengthening, weight loss, muscle gain, progressing and regressing exercises as needed. Each client’s program is individually goal specific. It also read Interests: Basketball and spending time with family and friends. Of course, I checked out his profile on FB and continued to get a good sense of him.

I called and made an appointment.

Oh, did I tell you that I am doing some online dating now? I look at my dating profile and the one thing about myself that I don’t like is – I had to mark “a few extra pounds.” I screen out men who are hunters and smokers. I am sure some men screen out women who carry extra weight.

I’m not going to get into the issue of how society sees women, judgment of men who won’t date fat women, etc. The issue really is I don’t see myself as a woman with extra pounds. My internal self is fit and healthy and loves to work out. Just need to get my outer self to match!

Iwannabeaskinnybitch!