“Why not ask a Loving Parent to help us reclaim our childhood innocence and to live more gently today?”
This week there has been a theme of addiction with my clients. Alcoholism and drug addiction affect the whole family. I remember when I first became a chemical dependency counselor back in the early 1980s. One of the poems I loved was this one. Maybe you can relate.
Daughters of the Bottle
until I was twenty-two
I didn’t think anyone else
had a drunk for a mother
then I met lori, joannie and susan
I recognized them immediately
by their stay away smiles
they were leaders in their work
who would say they were sorry
if somebody bumped into them
on a crowded street
I call on them
once in awhile
they always come
children of alcoholics
Juggler in A Mirror
“Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.”
― Martin Luther King Jr., A Testament of Hope: The Essential Writings and Speeches
Today is a great opportunity, not only to remember Martin Luther King, Jr., but to activate in your life today, and forward, the very characteristics that made him a great leader.
In your own life and business, how can the life of Martin Luther King, Jr. be a guide for you?
One characteristic comes from his famous speech “I Have a Dream.”
What is your dream for the world? With all the resources and cooperation you need, what changes would you make?
Envision the world you want to live in and the world you want to share with those you love.
What is your dream for your own life?
Martin Luther King, Jr. fought for equality when others would not. His life was one of education, service and leadership. He was involved in several groups and committees and learned to support and be supported in his endeavors in the civil rights movement.
How have you prepared yourself educationally to attain the goals you desire?
What services have you provided to help your community, a group or an individual? What services have you given to support your business?
How have you served in a leadership position and where have you found support for your causes?
Seemingly, taking a stand for Civil Rights alone, Martin Luther King, Jr. did not quit. Even while incarcerated he continued to work on his dream. He didn’t give up under the most difficult circumstances.
What are the hurdles you have to overcome to create your dream?
Today, what do you need to overcome to finish your project, take the next step or regain your focus?
What is the end result for your persistence? What is the planned goal and what will be your reward?
“People tend to criticize their spouse most loudly in the area where they themselves have the deepest emotional need.”
― Gary Chapman, The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate
Gary Chapman in his book The Five Love Languages teaches us to understand what makes us feel loved and what makes our loved ones feel loved. The five languages are 1) Words of Affirmation 2) Quality Time 3) Gifts 4) Acts of Service and 5) Physical Touch.
Have you ever had a friend who continually is asking for validation? A current or past love who is always touching you as you walk by, rubbing your shoulders, cuddling when you watch a movie? Someone who shops and is buying themselves gifts all the time? These may be clues to their love language.
If your mother’s love language is quality time, getting her a gift certificate for massage would not excite her the way taking her to an off-Broadway play would.
If you have a friend whose love language is Acts of Service, making her a book of coupons for services such as babysitting or yard work may be more important to her than getting her a new scarf.
If your loved one’s first love language is physical touch, you may want to plan a quiet evening alone and give each other foot rubs with a sensual essential oil.
You can take an online test at http://fivelovelanguages.com/ to find out your own love language. Let your family and friends know what your love language is and in doing this you may be able to explore theirs as well. You may find you score high on a few love languages. Let your loved ones know this and how they would express this to you.
My highest score is Acts of Service, although Quality Time and Physical Touch are close behind. When I think of this I remember a boyfriend who built a fence around my yard and how loved I felt. More recently friends wrote reviews for my book and it was the greatest expression of love they could have given me. I especially appreciate my friend David Sandoval, MD, an immunologist who wrote the review on the back of my book 12 Weeks to Self-Healing: Transforming Pain through Energy Medicine.
The Heart Chakra
“One love, one heart, one destiny.”
― Bob Marley
Writing about Love yesterday made me think about the heart chakra. When I was in my own heart, imaging those I love, I realized it was not my heart at all, but really the heart chakra that I focused on.
Many people are not aware of all the incredible information that is stored in the chakras. If you have ever had an intuitive reading from me, you know the power of this experience.
The heart chakra is the one people are aware of the most. It is the Power of Love. It relates to love, self-love, love of others, love of God (or your own word for the Divine,) affinity, loneliness, commitment, forgiveness, hope and trust.
On my website I have listed detailed information about each of the chakras. Take some time to journal about the fourth chakra and see how you can bring balance into your relationships and into your life.
Most of all though, practice focusing on your loved ones in your heart and experiencing the incredible feeling of love! When you do this you heal your heart and theirs!
As stated in the last blog, my word for 2014 is Relationships. This year, my commitment is to bring myself closer into relationship with those I love and care for. It also means becoming aware of the relationships that have been dysfunctional and stressful and if possible to ease out of these relationships, making more time to deepen my relationship with myself and with others.
Truly, I understand with relationships there are so many components. There is setting boundaries, compromise, compassion, clear communication, perspective and the list is nearly endless. In this 30 day Blog Challenge, I will share with you about my process (probably similar to yours,) in the area of relationships.
Hope you have chosen a word for this year as well. It can be one to focus upon to joyfully bring into your life or to focus upon and create a growth spurt. Music was an expansive word for me in 2013. I welcome Relationships in 2014, to challenge me to grow.