Thank God for acupuncture. It’s been around for 2000 years. It’s not going anyplace and people use it all of the time for a variety of cures and to avoid illnesses. – Tim Daly
Over the years I have referred many clients of mine (as a mental health and chemical dependency counselor) to acupuncture. It has been such a gift in my life. Many years ago when I worked at TASC (Treatment Alternatives to Street Crime) we had a contract to work with women who were addicted to heroin. I was the one who would be administering the treatment. In preparation I went to Pine Lodge Prison to talk with a woman there who was providing acupuncture to inmates.
When I went into the area she set up as a clinic, there were maybe 25 chairs in a circle. She and a coworker and I were invited to sit down and she would be with us in a minute. She went around putting small acupuncture needles in the ears, hands and feet of the inmates. Then she came to me. I tend to be somewhat stand-offish at first and have good boundaries. Before I could resist, this young, energetic, confident, beautiful young woman, put needles in me!
I sat there processing what was happening and tried to stay professional. After a few minutes she said she didn’t have time to talk with me and handed me some papers about acupuncture and heroin addition.
I was set back and not very happy about the situation until I got about half way back to the office. All of the sudden, I had all this energy and felt peace come over me. This continued for the rest of the day. I felt centered, relaxed and my mind was clear. I loved it.
I called her later and set up an appointment. When she was living in Spokane and when she visited, I saw her as often as I could. Sometimes I would see her for acupuncture, but mostly because she has become my very best friend.
Now I am seeing Dr. Song for acupuncture. After I weaned myself from the Hydrocodone from my oral surgery, I took ibuprofen. It helped a little, but my energy was low and my pain was high. When I went to see Dr. Song, he did Scalp Acupuncture! It was amazing. It reminded me of the very first time I had acupuncture.
When the needles were placed in my scalp, I could feel the energy moving down my arms and down the trunk of my body, down my legs and out my feet. Having been focused on the pain in my mouth and the constant headache for days, this felt heavenly.
If you have not tried acupuncture, I strongly recommend it. Many who struggle with health issues, with depression or obesity have a lot of energy stuck in their body. You don’t feel like moving, you have no desire to do anything, and everything takes effort. Acupuncture can open up channels of energy and bring you back into balance.
Having this blog experience chronicling increasing health and exercise and losing weight has been incredible. For those following along, I hope you are getting the benefits of increased health. I would love to hear your experiences.
“Well?” Ron said finally, looking up at Harry. “How was it?” Harry considered it for a moment. “Wet,” he said truthfully. Ron made a noise that might have indicated jubilation or disgust, it was hard to tell. “Because she was crying,” Harry continued heavily. “Oh,” said Ron, his smile faded slightly. “Are you that bad at kissing?” “Dunno,” said Harry, who hadn’t considered this, and immediately felt rather worried. “Maybe I am.” ― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
Disagree if you want, but this is NOT the way to date online!
I receive emails each week from men on Facebook. Now, that is okay with me since after four years of being single, I decided to date this year – remember, my word for 2014 is Relationships!
I’m not sure what would constitute an expert on relationships, but being a counselor for over 30 years gives me some credentials. Mostly though, I think what I am sharing is from past dating on dating sites and seeing what works and what doesn’t. This is gender focused, and I am fine with feedback. Leave your comments!
Men – the Don’ts
1. Don’t contact a woman on FB (or other social media) and leave three long paragraphs of how beautiful they look and what you would want to do with and to her, like hold her, take her dancing, etc.
2. Not the best idea to write a diatribe of what you do and who you are in the first or second email.
3. Sharing paragraphs of what you believe and what she should believe early on will turn her off!!
Men – the Do’s
1. When you contact a woman on Facebook, you may want to say “hi” and start with a comment about something she posted. This is an invitation to begin a dialogue and she sees that you have read her page (not just looked at her photo) She knows you are interested in her.
2. Share some things about yourself. Women are generally good at asking questions; so don’t overwhelm her with unsolicited sharing. Be aware of sharing too much too fast. Let the conversation unfold.
3. If you want to begin a conversation and a possible relationship, Facebook is not match.com. It can be too much for you both to disclose in the format of listing exactly what you want in a partner. You will rarely find all of it anyway, and not meeting all the criteria can stop the dialogue.
Women – Don’ts
1. This may seem odd to say, but believe me, I have seen this happen a lot! Don’t fall in love on the Internet! What people post whether it be photos or what they say may not be true. Have you ever watched the TV show Catfish!
2. Take some time to let the conversation unfold and see how the communication goes. You may not answer for a day or two (busy) and he may be fine with that or be reactive. Let his true personality come through.
3. Don’t give away too much information. Don’t give away money (I’ve seen it) or buy a plane ticket to see him or for him to see you. Be aware. Don’t be needy.
Women – Do’s
1. After a few emails, if you feel like you may want to get to know the person, ask him to Skype with you. This is better than the phone. You can hear his voice and see what he is doing. One of my clients did this and the man who she Skyped with was playing a game on his phone the whole time. NEXT. . . (A man who wrote paragraphs about my beauty last week contacted me. After checking out his FB page, I said “let’s Skype” and he disappeared!)
2. Trust your gut. Be aware and catch the first “hit” from your gut. Often in my counseling practice when a client is ending a relationship, I ask “when did you know this wasn’t right for you?” More often than not, they reply, the first day, week, etc.
3. We attract a partner who is at our same vibration. This can mean mental or emotional health. If you don’t feel like you have the self-esteem, confidence, or emotional health, work on yourself first. Whether you see a counselor, coach, healer, read a book, go to some kind of meetings, it doesn’t matter. Focus on, and heal yourself first. Then attract the man you deserve!
Well, I am hearing the word “harsh” in my head, but sometimes as a counselor, I think I have seen too much! Let’s finish with wishing you happy dating, and love ever after!
It is an enlightening view, sitting in my chair in my office as a mental health counselor. I am honored to sit with clients as they share about their lives and their relationships and I see themes unfold.
We have ended the year and are into the New Year. As I look ahead at new beginnings, it reminds me of one of the most common themes. When working with couples, I notice that, for most, by the time they enter my office, it’s too late.
Too often one of them attempted continually to communicate with the other, without being heard. Sadly, I watch their last attempt to keep the marriage together. The partner, let’s say the man, who has not really heard, but has listened as if she was nagging or on a rampage over something, finally understands. It is too late now for him to realize that what she was saying was important. So important, that the marriage is now over. I see him groveling and trying to make sense of it all. In the safety of another person (me) she says, “I’m sorry, but it is just too late.”
Many of us have ended relationships before the New Year. I remember myself, many years ago, sitting outside Nordstroms, having coffee with my lover on December 29th. I said, “I am sorry, but it’s over.” This was difficult to say and it was painful. I had felt though, that what I said over and over, didn’t matter and I was “pushing the river,” in order to create a change for us. It didn’t work. Once I was honest and ended the relationship; although painful, it was also exhilarating.
When I am with clients and they are suffering over a relationship, I often ask, “when did you first know this was not the right situation for you?” More than I would like to hear, they say, “in the beginning.” If not, they knew years before they decided to make a change.
Whether it be a love relationship, a work relationship or a family situation, “when you begin to lose your voice, your self-esteem, your sense of personal power; it is time to make some kind of a shift.”