The Victim Archetype

“The soul always knows what to do to heal itself. The challenge is to silence the mind” 

 Caroline Myss

Yesterday I shared information about the Saboteur Archetype and asked you to journal about your own Saboteur. I committed to doing this myself to find out what was underneath my over-caffeinating behavior on the drive to Sisters, Oregon.

What an incredible experience it was. I sat at my friend Susie’s house overlooking the mountains and journaled. What I realized was I was actually stressed to make this long drive, but I wasn’t letting myself feel this. Instead of planning to care for myself on the drive, I just pushed through.

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The other issue was, as much as I was delighted to go to The Healer’s Gathering, I was hesitant to spend three days in a group of 100 people. Being extremely sensitive has been great for my work as a psychic medium, but it also makes some other situations challenging.

Moving to our Healer Archetype!

Moving to our Healer Archetype!

When I journaled, I realized that often in my life I have been over-stimulated in situations where others do just fine. For many years I didn’t understand that I was so sensitive and often my responses appeared to others that I was being a victim. Today I know that those of us who fit the category of Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) have to take care of ourselves and plan ahead. It has been nearly impossible for me to communicate so others understand the situation, and it just created conflict.

To all the other HSPs – You are not victims! Say yes to self-care! I’m listening to this too!

In another blog I will share more about Highly Sensitive Persons, but today I want to continue with Archetypes and share about the Victim Archetype.

This information comes from information from Caroline Myss’ work in her Sacred Contracts book and the classes I took from her on Medical Intuition and Sacred Contracts. I have also added information that I have gained from working as a mental health counselor and chemical dependency professional for over 20 years.

Remember that we all have 4 archetypes that we share. These are the Child, Victim, Saboteur and Prostitute.  The gift of the Victim Archetype is Self-Esteem. 

In the process of self-healing, you have to come to terms with your victim self and move beyond this state of being. You can identify your victim, confront the behavior, love and forgive yourself and bring your energy into present time. In fact, unless you can bring at least 80% of your energy into present time, you will not have the power to self-heal. What do I mean by bringing yourself into present time? Watch your thoughts. Do you go off to the future (which can create anxiety) or drift off to the past (which can cause depression) or are you able to be present in the moment?

Enjoy exploring this archetype that can bring you high self-esteem once you embrace this part of yourself and move on!

Victim Archetype

Guardian of Self Esteem

Core issue is whether it is worth giving up your own sense of empowerment to avoid taking responsibility for your independence.

When you don’t stand up for yourself after awhile you no longer can tell the difference whether you are being victimized or not; so either you are being victimized and don’t know it or you are not being victimized, but act as if you are.

  • The victim archetype helps you decide what you will or will not do; a guardian of personal boundaries.

  • Lessons associated with the victim archetype demand that you evaluate your relationship to power, especially with people with whom you have control issues and have to set boundaries.

  • Primary objective is to develop self-esteem and personal power.

  • You have contracts with people whose primary purpose is to help you develop yourself-esteem through acts of honesty, integrity, courage, endurance and self-respect.

  • The victim will entice you to feel sorry for yourself.

  • You can act like a victim and give in or call upon your companions and guides for help.

  • Like the lion in the Wizard of Oz, you need to have the courage to look at your victim and make it your ally.

  • Do you victimize yourself in the way you interpret conversations with other people?

  • Does your victim alert you to protect yourself rather than letting people take advantage of you?

  • Does your victim motivate you to be shrewd in the dealings of whatever house it is in?

  • Does your empowered victim allow you to take risks in your life?

  • The victim urges us to act appropriately when we are in danger of being victimized.

  • The victim can alert us to being victimized through passivity and rash or inappropriate actions.

  • It can also alert us to how we victimize others for personal gain.

  • In shadow it may show how we play victim for sympathy or pity.

Join with me in delving into this Victim Archetype in your journal!

 

http://candesscampbell.com

http://iwannabeaskinnybitch.com 

 


Dreams

“I believe in everything until it’s disproved. So I believe in fairies, the myths, dragons. It all exists, even if it’s in your mind. Who’s to say that dreams and nightmares aren’t as real as the here and now?”

John Lennon

Whatever you believe about God or the Divine, we all share one thing in common. We all dream. Whether you have fun dreams, fantasy dreams, detailed and confusing dreams or nightmares: you do dream.

My belief is that there is a part of you that you can access what some call your “Higher Self.” This is the wise part of you that is mostly subconscious and continues to communicate with you at a subtle level. Your ego often blocks this information, in an attempt to stay in control and so you aren’t overwhelmed with too much information at once. It is a filter and the “old guard.” 

book_radha_realities

Your dreams are messages from this wise “Higher Self,” and when worked with on a consistent basis or even occasionally with a powerful dream, you can change your life in amazing ways! 

Many of my students and clients have said they don’t remember their dreams. The way to change this is to put a notebook and fast writing pen by your bed every night. Before you fall asleep, ask yourself to remember your dreams in the nighttime. If you awake in the night, write your dream down or do it in the morning. Remember, dreams are fleeting, so you will need to practice to capture them!

dream

For those who are techier, grab your smart phone and record the dream into it and email the message to yourself. You will be amazed to find the email in your inbox in the morning!

Reading books on dreams helps you to remember them. These are my favorite books that will not only help you remember, but will also assist you in finding out what your Higher Self has to say to you! 

Realities of the Dreaming Mind: The Practice of Dream Yoga, by Swami Sivananda Radha

Where People Fly and Water Runs Uphill: Using Dreams to Tap the Wisdom of the Unconscious, by Jeremy Taylor.

Continued awareness, continued consciousness frees up the blocks that keep you from becoming healthy, active and fully alive! 

Iwannabeaskinnybitch!

Curious about my work?  http://candesscampbell.com


Not Giving Up!

“It’s probably my job to tell you life isn’t fair, but I figure you already know that. So instead, I’ll tell you that hope is precious, and you’re right not to give up.”          ― C.J. RedwineDefiance

Chakra 5

 This series of blogs called iwannabeaskinnybitch.com began July 30, 2014. This has been my journey into health, exercise and weight loss after having a breakthrough in the journal class I was facilitating on the Fifth Chakra – The Power of Communication. You can read the whole story in this blog, but it ended with clear communication with mySelf and getting a personal trainer for exercise.

 Well, I just about lost it! I was on a great path, being motivated and eating well and losing weight. Then I had some oral surgery which involved Hydrocodone, the withdrawal from Hydrocodone. Ugh!

 Even though, Domingo walked me daily and we took some incredibly beautiful long walks. The day I was scheduled to go back to the gym, it was a rainy day. After a series of really hot days, I really wanted to just curl up and read.

 I could see how I would have found all kinds of excuses not to go to the gym. Then I would be upset with myself and possibly give up on the process all together. 

Luke Brady

Luke Brady

My scheduled appointment with Luke Brady was a godsend! I looked forward to his reminder text and showed up wimpy and disheveled. I just about lost it – I almost gave up. Instead – I left the gym energized, feeling hot, happy, motivated and back on track.

 

Whatever your struggle to get healthy, whether it be changes in diet, increasing your movement or educating yourself about your body, mind, Spirit connections – invest in yourSelf! Don’t give up!

Iwannabeaskinnybitch!

http://candesscampbell.com 

 


India

“India shaped my mind, anchored my identity, influenced my beliefs, and made me who I am. …

India matters to me and I would like to matter to India.” 
― Shashi Tharoor

As I continue in this relationship series and also pack for my trip to India, I am feeling a little reminiscent of my previous trip to India.

Today, I have a video blog. It is a little self-indulgent, but I’ll just present it as one way of being in relationship with oneself. Enjoy!

India 2010 097

The Wedding Raja and I attended!

India 2010 2 262

Dinner at the Taj – Ray Boy, Raja and Candess

My new friend!

My new friend!

Mother Teresa

Mother Teresa

Travel has always created magical changes in my life and hopefully that of others. When I sat at the Tomb of Mother Teresa I cried and cried. It was cleansing and healing and she has now come to be one of my guides.  I look forward to the many souls I will meet in the next few weeks! Blessings to all who read this post!


Being the Pole

“When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are.” 
― Donald MillerA Million Miles in a Thousand Years: What I Learned While Editing My Life 

Relationships are fluid and changing all the time. Communication is often a challenge and keeping up with the shifting can be disconcerting. In this video I teach you to “Be the Pole.”  It is a great way to stay stable when you have a partner that is either reactive or changing their minds continually.  Enjoy!

 


Getting it through your Thick Skull!

 

I think it was when I ran into Kerouac and Burroughs – when I was 17 – that I realized I was talking through an empty skull… I wasn’t thinking my own thoughts or saying my own thoughts.                             Allen Ginsberg

“I can’t get it through your thick skull,” a character on a TV show says. What does it mean? Being a writer, I often listen for sayings and I wonder where they came from.

Have you ever talked with someone and you shared with her as clearly as you can, and when she responded, what she said had nothing to do with what you said?

Communication can be difficult when your head is full of your own thoughts. You are stuck in your own perspective and you can’t seem to find room for how anyone else sees the world.

What happens for all of us is we tend to defend ourselves by taking a stand on something. We see it our way, and close down our minds to other possibilities. In part, this can be a survival tool; to not become so sensitive to all that is happening around, and to just focus on our task.

In relationship though, this can be frustrating and derisive. Have you ever heard two people sharing with each other and you could see both sides, but they could not see the others point at all?

I remember an old 1970’s TV episode of All in the Family, with Archie and Edith Bunker. In this episode, they were discussing politics. Archie was irate when he found out Edith had voted for the opposing candidate from Archie’s. All he could see was his vote didn’t count. She had cancelled it out. They went round and round and he could not understand her vote had nothing to do with his. He would never understand this of course.

Archie

We all have this tendency to “have a thick skull” at times. Being a reader, I love seeing the world from other people’s perspective, especially other cultures. How I am in close relationship, well, that may be a different story.

The goal of course is to try to see situations from the other person’s perspective. This can be done in the privacy of your own mind. You don’t have to give up your position. Once you do practice seeing the other point of view though, it becomes easier. You don’t have to agree with the opposing view, but being open to hearing it and understanding why one would see it that way helps strengthen relationship.

Since I mentioned liking to read books that take on a different perspective, I’ll share three of my favorites.

The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver

poisonwood

Stones from the River by Ursula Hegi

Stones Hegi

Cutting for Stone by Abraham Verghese

Cutting for Stone

Enjoy!


Meditation

The greatest gift I have found to develop a greater intuitive experience is meditation.  It was in my meditative experience one morning I was given a specific meditation I now use.

Many of you already meditate and if you do, that is wonderful! You know the value of creating this time for yourself and the incredible connection you find with your Higher Self and the Divine. For many there is also the experience of connecting and communicating with Angels or Guides.

Many people who have tried meditation and don’t continue often think they are doing it wrong. Let me clarify some of the misconceptions. In meditation, you will ….

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