Posted: October 15, 2014 | Author: Candess M. Campbell, PhD | Filed under: Energy Medicine DNA, Iwannabeaskinnybitch | Tags: Amit Ray, anger, anxiety, bitch, Candess, Candess Campbell, chanting, complacency, conscious, Domingo, food, fun, Health, Housewives, Indian, Indian women, iwannabeaskinnybitch, journal, Kindle, life, Meditation, Mumbai, nurture, Om, over-function, past, relaxing, rest, Scandalous, skinny, skinny bitch, stress, Stuffing feelings, weight, weight gain, women |
If you want to conquer the anxiety of life, live in the moment, live in the breath.
Amit Ray, Om Chanting and Meditation
Into the third month of my health plan, I’m getting to a place of complacency. What is showing up is the problem underneath . . . which for me has been stress.
My stress as I have shared, comes from doing too much. I won’t go into all that I do. Many of us do too much!
What I will say though is I notice when I over-function, I experience stress. Because I love what I do, I often don’t take the necessary time to rest. Stress is stress! Whether you are having fun or in chaos, it is still stress.
I am happy that I have lost some weight, feel better in my clothes, get compliments, but mostly, I am happy that I feel like I am in control of my life.
My focus for the next few days is to be conscious of what I am doing. Is it necessary? Fun? Relaxing?
This morning I awoke and lie in bed next to Domingo and read Scandalous Housewives: Mumbai on my Kindle. Now, that was relaxing. I enjoyed the comfort of my bed, seeing the tops of the trees and the sky out the window and having a fresh cup of coffee as I lost myself in the lives of these Indian women.
For me what has been under my weight gain has been stress.
Other reasons we may gain weight:
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Stuffing feelings
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Living in the past
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Lack of planning around food
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Underlying health issues
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Chronic anger
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Lack of education
There are so many more.
Hope you are using your journal to connect more deeply with yourSelf in your own process toward better health.
Some sentence stems to play with . . .
If you have not used the Sentence Stems yet, you can find how to do this here!
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I become stressed when . . .
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I unwind best by . . .
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If I nurtured myself I would . . .
Posted: August 10, 2014 | Author: Candess M. Campbell, PhD | Filed under: Energy Medicine DNA | Tags: athletic trainer, bench press, bitch, Candess, Candess Campbell, Chris Leavitt, gym, Health, iwannabeaskinnybitch, juice, massage, Meetup.com, Million Dollar Listing, muscle, nutritionist, plank, Self-Healing, skinny, Spa, spirituality, wannabe, weight, weight gain, weight lifting |
Day Ten (This was Friday)
Okay, I confess. When my bookkeeper comes on Friday morning, the day I don’t see clients, while having my morning coffee I like to catch up on recorded TV shows. This morning before going to work out with my trainer Luke, I caught up on Million Dollar Listing: Miami. When I was watching Chris Leavitt’s open house I got an idea. The wife of the owner of the building was a nutritionist so he served the best juice he could find instead of the usual cocktails. He had yoga instructors teaching and demonstrating yoga on the terrace. The focus was on how to relax when you are stressed. He even had a woman who calculated the antioxidants in their systems.
Well Chris is the quintessential health nut. He spends a lot of time and money to take care of himself from what he eats to what he wears. He has luxurious spa days and . . .
What I realized is I would be a lot more careful about what I put in my body and have a much better attitude about my body if I spent less time in my head and working and thinking and more time having spa days. I can see it now. I have just had a massage and I am laying in a warm towel with a good book and the attendant brings me a pure, fresh water with lemon. I could get used to this.

Okay, but now I am off to the gym. Hope there are not planks today, but if there are, I am closing my eyes and going to the spa!
Friday Afternoon
Second day of training proves to be great! I am learning so much. Not only am I becoming aware of my body, but also how it is I don’t support my health. For those who already know me, I am a compulsive creative! I spend too much time in my head!
Luke, bless his heart adjusted the incline of the bench when I did my weights this time. It made it easier for me to sit straight up after my set. This is until I build up my back strength. But while lifting the weights, rather than focusing on my chest, I am creating a workshop in my head for my Meetup.com group, Spirituality & Self-Healing. This is where Luke would demonstrate some weight training exercises and offer a package deal where he will go to the home of his customer and train them! I caught myself and was able to get back into directing my mind to muscle.

Now for the plank! Even though he also adjusted this exercise for me and I was able to be on my knees, I still closed my eyes and went into a day spa in my mind. This was a great workout. My body continues to feel stronger and he does not push me. He is communicative and responsive which is great. On my own, I would push myself, get exhausted, discouraged and quit. It feels good to be present to my body.
Posted: August 8, 2014 | Author: Candess M. Campbell, PhD | Filed under: Energy Medicine DNA | Tags: athletic, athletic trainer, build muscle, Campbell, Candess, Candess Campbell, Chakra, communication, fifth chakra, iwannabeaskinnybitch, journal, karate, motivated, relationship, thyroid, weight, weight gain |
Day One
Wouldn’t you know! It was when I was facilitating a journal class on the fifth chakra (throat – communication) that it all came to me. In one of the writing exercises I realized how great it was to have the support I am receiving in my business. I have a Mahfuzul who does my websites, Filip who edits the sound on my mp4s, Robert who fixed my Outlook issues, and Julie who is absolutely the best bookkeeper ever! Great awareness.
The next sentence stem was picked by one of the students. We wrote “What I need to change is. . .” Well, was I ever surprised!
My writing went like this. What I need to change is what I need to change. What the __ does that mean? A little anger here. Some pain is coming up. My face – there is pressure near my eyes and cheeks. I am feeling defensive and protective of myself. This really hit a nerve. What? I am breathing deeply. My solar plexus is tight. My throat is closing up. Okay this is the 5th chakra so let’s talk about my thyroid. I have a lump on my thyroid the size of a plum. Okay. I am getting clearer. I feel like crying. I feel hopeless around my weight . . .
Private journaling information –
. . . I have been talking today about how good it feels to have help, support, work as a team. I am sad about (relationship ending – touch, oxytocin, etc.) My dad and I cuddled and I gained weight because he and I ate all the sugary foods. I do want to create a relationship where I can be supported by someone when I work out and get healthier. I don’t want to wait for a relationship. For this part I will get a trainer. Oh, that feels better. Whew! Again, I don’t have to do it alone!

What I realized is that even though I am very self-motivated, in this area of my life, I am NOT! I do need help.
When it was my turn, I shared my writing and my “ah-ha” with the group. One of the women shared that she meets with her trainer 5 x a week. She said she lost weight but needed to build muscle and it was doctor recommended!
So I am making an appointment with an athletic trainer!
Are you ready for a breakthrough?
Iwannabeaskinnybitch!